The Sewer Creature

I have a lifestyle that other people think is weird. I’ve even been called a freak for it, or a monster. I’m neither of those things. You see, I like to spend time in the sewers beneath the city. That’s what I tell people at first, at least. I actually live there. It all started …

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The Strange Suburb

Keymore is weird, I’ve decided. I came here once a few years ago, when the Lemur sanctuary was still here, and that was okay. We basically just drove into the sanctuary and drove out again at the end, although we did drive past the farmer’s market and we got some really weird looks. Like they …

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The Fever!

OH. MY. ROD. Fishing rod, that is. I must admit, although I’ve been dragging my feet through Sails of Our Lives, I did find the last couple of episodes compelling. How could I possibly not? They finally unveiled the secret that Donna has been keeping in the brig- her own personal possum farm, which also …

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Gingerbread Man

Christmas: is there a better time of year for constructing houses out of gingerbread? In a word, yes. There most certainly is, at least if you live in Australia. In fact, Christmas is the worst possible time for that activity.  Gingerbread houses were invented in places with exceptionally cold festive seasons, and they just don’t …

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An Inauspicious Theme

Lunar Agents have been sent out far and wide to research the viability of building a rocket. And that…seems a little suspicious to me. We were told that the rocket was pretty much finished…and now we’re searching for information on whether a rocket can be built at all? Suspicious. If my travel and accommodation weren’t …

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The Fence Whisperer

They say you can tell how much a house is going to sell for by the quality of its front fencing. It’s not about the type of fence, exactly, or even that there is one. It’s more about the deliberateness with which choices have been made regarding it. Like, has it been selected with consideration …

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Leave Aluminium Alone!

I’ve been watching Gabrielle’s Broadcast Bites for…oh, about three episodes now? I’m not sure I like it very much, but it’s like trainwreck television: you can’t look away. This is just as bad as Eurovision, except this doesn’t have the dignity to try to distract you with sequined outfits and catchy-yet-terrible songs. Briella thinks she’s …

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I Must Jig!

You know, I’ve always thought that a career in podiatry would be fulfilling. And by ‘always’, I do of course mean the couple of months that I’ve been alive. Or…not quite alive, but you know what I mean, tee-hee. Since my feet are just bones, I can see how they’re put together. Quite complex they …

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The Cruisiest Rebellion

It may be sad, but I think the way that all plants are heading is plastic. Humans are a species are becoming more and more lazy, with more of our jobs and tasks becoming automated. Eventually, on one very sad day, everyone’s just going to throw up their hands and say “look, we gave it …

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